Great Natural photos, that you can purchase for yourself, friends and family.
I enjoyed looking at the Gallery.
Great Natural photos, that you can purchase for yourself, friends and family.
I enjoyed looking at the Gallery.
What a tormented world, where we are between self expression, facts and firm beliefs being dragged into a quagmire of toxic interactions. How do we manage this unending stream of uncivil discourse? It isn’t simple but I will break it down. It relies on discipline, self awareness and boundaries.
The first two are the hardest, discipline and self awareness. Self awareness perhaps the hardest of the two. I can and usually do go on about meditation, sorting ones minds and emotions, and choosing actions, thoughts and emotions, I won’t here. This takes years of discipline and practice. Discipline which is equally important, the willingness to reflect, self audit each and every reaction, and hone actions and reactions with conscious and deliberate forethought and planning. Discipline is about decisions and creating a habit. This is where most people lapse into addictions what they believe about themselves, and don’t do the continuous work to improve. One must get past that, one has to have tools to make decisions from.
Harry Callahan: A man’s GOT to know his limitations.
This is where it gets difficult. I have been accused of coming to a verbal knife fight with a gatling gun. I may have had the last word, and shut the conversation to the stand still. But the cases where I did this I never convinced anyone. And I am sure I didn’t make any new friends.
A discussion or civil discourse is when two sides talk about facts, where they got them, mull over their value, experiences, identify each other’s concerns and if an action is needed how to go about taking an action, and backing it out or altering it as it goes. This doesn’t happen very often except maybe at some jobs, and the boss, supervisor or leader, has a final say of the direction to be taken. Too often the leader has to quell arguments and opinions. They decide the action, their position and authority is accepted and the world keeps on working, usually.
Any step further goes down. Not unlike from the movie the Mummy.
Arguments, may use experiences, anecdotes, similes, metaphors and yet like a discussion a solid answer isn’t really known. Experiences from a certain set of circumstances may have more weight than others, it is how we handle this information. As soon as opinion comes to play all hopes of civil discourse disappears into the gaping void. And like any good intention, it paves the road to hell.
Logical discussions are based on a common set of language, a common set of facts, and usually an equal understanding what those facts mean. A logical argument starts with a set of priories. A set of assumptions that all parties understand that they are working with. A good philosophical debate, will worry over most meanings of words, what they mean, and the assumptions or priories that one is working with. Logically, based on what those assumptions are or are not, the pros and cons can be of an idea can be discussed.
Opinions are based on personal assumptions. The assertion of opinions are set out as assumptions. When people get back to these assumptions, regardless of the discussion, those assumptions if taken personally, the discussion ends. Personal based beliefs or assumptions, that are part of an opinion are not up for debate. End of story. Beliefs are not necessarily rational. I believe a table is blue, other people see it as a table and is blue, I don’t believe it any more, I know, and I know they know. As soon as I say I believe in a fact, the fact becomes part of a questionable experience. That fact is held onto with emotional investment, from experience. The belief someone uses has an equal or strong amount of emotion invested in it. There are stories, similes, metaphors and illogical leaps of assignment of emotions to something portrayed similar to an idea or a supposition. A strongly held belief, that underlies someone’s opinion, makes that opinion off limits for discussion. One may want to engage you with their opinion, but it is not for a discussion but for proselytization. They want support for their belief. This is were discussion should end.
We don’t set the boundary to end the discussion. We don’t realize that the discussion is over. Whether it is facts, beliefs, sound logic or emotionally linked rationale, people get drawn into all the toxic slugfest of what the Greek philosophers called Sophistry.
How do we tell when the discussion is over.
Liberally taken from online Dictionary. Techniques of rhetoric are examples.
Bombast is when high-sounding language with little meaning is used to impress people.
Hyperbole is when exaggerated statements or claims not meant to be taken literally are made.
Simile is used when a figure of speech involving the comparison of one thing with another thing of a different kind, used to make a description more emphatic or vivid (e.g., as brave as a lion, crazy like a fox ).
Exhortation is an address or communication emphatically urging someone to do something.
Straw man argument is an intentionally misrepresented proposition that is set up because it is easier to defeat than an opponent’s real argument.
False equivalence is a logical fallacy in which two completely opposing arguments appear to be logically equivalent when in fact they are not. This fallacy is categorized as a fallacy of inconsistency.
Up to this point, one can start looking at the method of arguments. Identify that the opinions and rationalizations are opinions and hard held beliefs. Recognize it, say so, and let it go. The stinging thing can be said about how you feel and think about the sources of these arguments. This does not win friends. When it is based on societal imprinting and hard held emotionally charged opinions, these feelings make sense to them. The ideas are strung together with emotionally charged feelings about each point of the argument. The lapses of logic and connection are glossed over with the emotions of what feels right and what makes sense.
There is no way one can wedge sense, ones own emotions, or logic into these beliefs. The addiction to this whole pattern of belief and rationalization go to the core of the person’s and sadly a large section of society beliefs in who they are. The moment you make them uncomfortable, with facts, and your own feelings (and they will be dismissed) because they can’t feel like themselves, the emotional shift does not square with their feelings, and their ability to think doesn’t fit either. The whole thought process is usually hijacked with propaganda, a culturally contrived sense of right and wrong with a series of connected feelings with facts and lies that are loosely connected. The belief is based on what feels right. The loss of identity and a sense of self, will be fought back aggressively.
Sadly it has become ingrained into the American psyche as a cultural norm to also use abusive techniques. This is a boundary that needs to be set as a hard limit. The perpetrators will not change. This is the nature of parasites and that of sociopaths, narcissists and psychopaths. The boundary between believers and abusers is getting murkier than ever.
Ad hominen is an argument or reaction directed against a person rather than the position they are maintaining.
Gaslighting is when one manipulates someone by psychological means into questioning their own sanity.
Sealioning (also spelled sea-lioning and sea lioning) is a type of trolling or harassment which consists of pursuing people with persistent requests for evidence or repeated questions, while maintaining a pretense of civility ( Poland, Bailey (November 2016). Haters: Harassment, Abuse, and Violence Online. University of Nebraska Press. pp. 144–145. ISBN978-1-61234-766-0.)
There are the more abusive patterns than just Gas-lighting etc. https://thoughtcatalog.com/shahida-arabi/2016/06/20-diversion-tactics-highly-manipulative-narcissists-sociopaths-and-psychopaths-use-to-silence-you/
In the above articles, they start using the concept of triangulation. This is were they develop co-dependents and enablers to further abuse their victims. And victims band together to survive this also. Then it becomes this toxic us or them mindset. Which is true. And the abusers will use projection, to make them look like the victim.
This brings us to the point where we develop ethnocentrism. A convenient way to set social boundaries without calling it bigotry. The Bigotry is based on the abusive non-inclusive type of behavior, or the outright abusive proselytizing.
The sad fact of the matter, is when the abused as co-dependents stop being enablers, or continue being victims, they learn to be abusers themselves or counter-dependents. https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/theory-knowledge/201404/signs-counter-dependency or https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Counterdependency for more information. It can be self protective measure, or becomes its own toxic condition with others.
There are techniques on dealing with all of this. This information is all about definitions on how you can set boundaries. Once you understand it and choose to change your behavior, based on those boundaries, it is your choice on whether or not you get out of toxic communications of opinions, beliefs or propaganda. My go to method is to leave the argument, distance myself from the people, and if called for call out the issues listed above. I am not attacking, just their method of verbal assault. Because it is definitely not a discussion nor will it be civil discourse. Too often when it gets toxic, the abusers has their co-dependents attacking you. Out of sight out of mind, and those that will need healing and help after they too become victims, won’t have the thought of you contaminated. It is tough, to just walk away from letting insanity, lies and deceit fester. The only thing it will do is damage you. In workplace situations, do what you can, play the games in the articles, and usually get yourself out of there and be appreciated somewhere else. And get out before you become the same as the victimizers. That is hard to do.
There is a personal acquaintance that I am developing a friendship with. The issue of the Honduran asylum seekers were brought up. The association of these refugees were made to like an army, an invasion force, and people coming into one’s personal home and taking everything. I tested those assumptions. They were all knocked down. The political facts, the false equivalences were presented and were summarily dismissed. Then I was asked for more arguments, that is sea-lioning. I said so, and the opinions and assumptions are based on external propaganda that was inciting hate and fear. I didn’t mean to, but, I dismissed them being his own personal hard felt beliefs and opinions. I truthfully gave my opinion of the sources of those assumptions. But I also drew a line and exited the argument. Also I said anything I say or do in regards to that discussion would only excite that fear and anger that those arguments, rationale of those hard held opinions. Fear and Hate are unquenchable fires, the only thing one can do is not feed them.
This has taken me literally decades to develop the discipline, and practice along with the self awareness, to not allow myself to get drawn into an unwinnable conversation. It wasn’t a discussion or an argument. My choice of ending that discourse on my part was hard, but in my own defense necessary. Don’t attack the speaker, attack the method, the lack of of facts, or the source of them, and get the hell out. The testing of their assumptions, feelings and opinions will be personal enough and will make the person feel attacked. Assumptions, feelings and opinions that a person doesn’t check for validity, it reflects what they feel and take for granted about themselves. Seeing and hearing that, don’t attack them, you call them beliefs and opinions you don’t share, and get the hell out of the conversation.
Hopefully with boundaries and discipline with self awareness, the toxic rhetoric avoided, you will change or define how you will discuss things with people. If by setting an example, and boundaries, this will at least for you improve what acceptable conversations would be. This is a perfect example of not falling into a level beneath you. Why, you set boundaries, and with self discipline and self awareness, you set boundaries for your self and bar that must be met when dealing with you. It has over the years helped me stave off a lot of people playing these mind games on me, wittingly or not.
Today is so difficult to have civil and meaningful discourse and discussions, that presages the fall of a great society, into isolated squabblers that others can manipulate. It is my hope the readers of this will endeavor to set examples in our society, so we can start the journey toward healing ourselves and our society.
“Frodo:I wish the ring had never come to me, I wish none of this had happened. Gandalf: So do all who live to see such times but that is not for them to decide, All you have to decide is what to do with thetime that is given to you.”
Lord of the Rings, by Tolkien
I have been afforded the luxury of getting old. Not that being sixty years old is ancient in our day and age. I have been blessed with a stalwart and robust physiology, a keen mind, empathic and sensitive nature, and a fierce disposition. Granted I have not seen the worst of times, been abused as thoroughly as others nor have I been blessed with an easy life.
The United States has had it’s run. The great experiment of democracy, flawed with elitism, slavery, genocide, filled with excess european elites, the criminal elements, and the poor. Later the dreams and aspirations of those with humbler histories than their equivalents in europe, sell a story of success. The luck that was carved was made mostly by ruthlessness than actual great endeavors. It is ever thus those who do, are competent, and intelligent will be taken advantage of those that don’t deserve a damn thing, except there general organizational skills (still stolen from others) and their exceptional abilities to get others to do the work for them. Granted there are the few exceptions, and with great luck, and their own bit of shiestering, made it big.
The war of 1812, the British offered freedom to the slave and the indentured. The United States doubled down on keeping slaves. The Civil War was much about regional power as it was about slavery. The North and the Union won the right to make everyone else wage slaves. Every expansion was marketed, managed and anyone who made it big with it, was just a stepping stone for the Oligarchs to expand their power, and make the rest of us wage slaves. Here is where the multi-generational family took its first hit, with families separating, brother vs brother over politics, power and stakes in the country’s future that they had no real stake in.
For a large country to succeed you have to have communication, transportation and resources. And those who control them, control the country and the people. The first set of Unions were for the people who worked in transportation. One of the reasons for the war of 1812 was to keep Britain from stealing our sailors, and boats. Railroad owners took advantage of workers to work long dangerous hours, make them pay for the privilege of room and board, and keeping wages from wives and widows. Unions were created to make sure at least widows got the pay earned. When railroad unions had strikes, for livable conditions, they were met by Federal troops. Coal miners, took to strikes and were met with Federal troops, the original red necks.
Meanwhile, in the name of Christianity and Bigotry, we committed genocide on the Native American Indigenous peoples. We may have pretended to give them their land and rights to vote, but we still steal their land, and allow murder, rape and all manners of abuse til this very day.
Since the Civil War every successful city, financial endeavors, homes, the ability to vote for the African Americans, has been met with, mass killings, lynchings, murders, rapes, legalized theft of every kind and injustice.
Every group of immigrants have been relegated to ghettos, directed to the most mean and cruel jobs, and given such an abuse, that communities created within toughest sectors of cities were created and discriminated each in turn. Only to look forward to the next set of immigrants to take their turn of hell that wasn’t as bad as the hell they came from.
The depression came, the ruthless rich stayed rich, those that weren’t positioned well fell into obscurity. What was left of multi-generational families were scattered across the country. Even with the bigotry, villages, towns and local centers, with multigenerational families and the elites, brokered power locally, and made sure that they had representation along the way up to state or national representation. Of course, thieves stole, the powerful controlled, but in the end, there was representation of the landed people. After the depression and efforts to get the country back on its feet and prepped for World War II, the people of the United States were regimented into corporate lives in suburbs, associating in tight ageist and socially stratified but isolated groups. Mobility was initiation to one group to another. Those who didn’t make it into a group, was denied any social mobility. This is where the young, the poor, the socially different, were disenfranchised and pitted against other poor, the minorities and the disenfranchised. We lost multi-generational families, and we lost the concept of community. Those who took for granted their socialization with well mechanized ushering from one segment of society to another lost the view of a real family, community, the diversity that was minimal at best is now gone. The expectation of fitting in and becoming homogenized in this cattle trough of socialization are totally blinded by their self made shackles and self imposed expectations.
Today Germany is leading the way and working with other nations to keep the European Union strong and integrated. Germany is anti-fascist after WWII. The United States has taken on nationalism and corporate socialism, is how Mussolini described Fascism. Israel and the Israelis have taken on committing genocide of Palestinians. The Hasidim and orthodox have been replaced by conservative secular Israelis. They are supported by a brand of Zionism there and in the United States for a manifest destiny of some religious prophecies. The millennialists took the Utopian vision of a Jewish Diaspora, and WWII with a Jewish state, imbedded it in with conservative and evangelical Christian cults or sects, to support what looks like a fascist apartheid state in Israel. The millennialism doctrines were created by people putting these ideas in the framework of a “prophetic visions and sayings” from a mentally challenged child in the early 1800’s. That concept is an anathema to most of these American branded modern evangelical protestant cults. Of all the headway on minority rights, women’s suffrage, civil rights, union rights, the civil freedoms of citizens, have been eroded by bigotry and ethnocentrism of isolated groups of people manipulated by hate and fear.
The Republican party has always been about the corporate elite controlling the country. Democrats evolved out of the disenfranchised the various types of Mob control of cities. The support of the disenfranchised, ruthless as mobs are there was economic growth and support of the communities. You can’t steel from those who have nothing. In the 60’s the Republicans made a token party platform of supporting social issues. The Democrats moved to add minorities and civil rights in the south and split the Dixiecrats that got absorbed into the Republicans GOP. The very bigotted south joined the party of Lincoln, and support to this day the destruction of the middle class, for the increasing wealth of the corporate oligarchs. The south didn’t rise to win. It rose to give its soul to the very thing that they hated. Between Democrats infiltrating and usurping third parties, and the early third parties a century ago being infiltrated by communists, the conservatives vilified both as being socialists and communists. The Republic onslaught can be identified step by step. Nixon got rid of the Gold standard. Started negotiations with China, which now is the premium source of cheap labor. Non-gold standard banks support the world’s oligarchs and have made it a point to destroy countries that held to it, so far except China. The state department and the pentagon was infiltrated by the political and corporate powers as another solid revenue stream of corruption. Reagan’s tax reforms, immediately made as many loopholes in Income tax and the middle class kept on paying more in taxes. Did away with the FCC control of insisting that TV and Radio presented news and education. Bush Sr. attacked Social Security, and insert privatization of retirement funds that can be managed, thieved and stolen by the rich. Bush Jr. Administration saw to that. NAFTA agreements from republican congresses pushed onto the Clinton’s administration, saw industries leave the united states and retirement plans and funds disappear before workers reach retirement. We have made corporations people, but they don’t serve or pay taxes. Money becomes freedom of speech, so all the voices of the under represented will never be heard, or now can be brain washed thoroughly. Campaign reforms were totally changed so at a national level only those who coddle the ultra rich oligarchs have a chance of being elected. We have facade of a democracy, and have a defunded education system creating non-critical thinking constituents.
Russians in the Soviet days, were Anti-Fascists, are supporting the Anti-Communist republicans, and the republicans are complicit in their relationship to Russia that is run by a Mobocracy that keeps corporations and the oligarchy from ruining the country.
I have had the misfortune of being ears to first hand witnesses, where they have chosen to stay hidden, or who have died, of many conspiracies that turn out to be in fact true. Power can make you look away from the bodies that they kill and make disappear.
Christians are supporting Israelis Zionists in Genocide, and those in politics who support misogyny, bigotry, the dismantling of the rights of the citizens, and supporting the abuse of anyone that doesn’t fit in a tight bigotted racist christian state. All the while supporting politicians, who are racists, bigots, rapists, pedophiles and liars of every stripe. The alignment with the dominionists 7 hills strategy, is the very 7 hills of rome and the anti-christ that fundamentalists were warning against 50 years ago. They are embracing if fully.
The hypocrisy and anti-christian behavior here astounds me. I do look fondly back in the days were my first social acceptance was in a Baptist Church. The hypocrisy of being forgiven every sin, including the ones people continue to commit is still beyond me.
Peter Sellers last movie “Being There” as Chance the Gardner,
Chance the Gardener: As long as the roots are not severed, all is well. And all will be well in the garden.
The tawdry details of my misadventures notwithstanding, and all of the above I have one irrational belief. I believe in the inherent goodness of people, and human beings do have a chance to evolve. The constant disappointment in observing what people do is painful. The joy of goodness and justice as sparse and infrequent as it is, gives me hope.
Cassandra of Troy blessed with prophecy by Apollo, and was also cursed by Apollo, for spurning an agreement to a relationship, to not be believed. Were someone blessed with prophecy today and yesterday, they would not be believed. Not from some divine curse. The relationship with Apollo would have been the association with power. Without power, who cares what you have to say.
We will have Civil War. It will be lopsided. A lot of good and innocent people will be murdered, who have chosen not to arm themselves. The Government will develop an autocratic state, the government we know will be gone and replaced. For the most part it already has. While the country may have just had the Democrats recently taken control of congress, the corporate controlled infrastructure will take the teeth away. Looking powerless, the country will acquiesce to the oligarchy. All that will be left is to parade the corpse of democracy around until decency and corruption will force people to lay it down.
What to do. We have to change and evolve. Those who have must survive, to teach to keep the dreams and hopes of a just and fair civilization. That is all I have left to give. It is the idea of a family, clan and society structure for a tribal unit. It is designed to create leaders, that support a diverse group of people. It won’t work unless it is heterogeneous and diverse. The indigenous cultures that we have almost destroyed, have the culture or atleast its history of how to create and maintain tribes. They also had means of working with other tribes. Was it working 100% everywhere, no. Each group of people either grow the elders and leaders with wisdom, or they grow groups of people who are parasites to the community killing it. People Embracing Change was framed with this idea. The idea is great, but it is worthless if there is only less of a handful of people willing to work it. The Elders of People Embracing Change, are devoted to help people become thinking caring authentic people; and, not to become a rubber stamp of ersatz molds of a society who takes everyone for granted. People talk about community, they support leaders who do all the work. And, they tear them down because they offer no work or nothing better. Or they want to fill some egocentric need that just serves to destroy a group.
We need communities that work by a commonly developed wisdom and effort, not by a carrot and a stick. Soon there will be no carrot and only a bloody stick.
Communication, its lack, and miscommunication, plague people who won’t learn to be uncomfortable.
One of the hardest things for people learning the witches triangle is silence.
Then there is cast not pearls to swine.
And in many cases, all the words in the world will never help someone to understand something when they don’t have a common frame of reference.
Spiritual societies, initiatory traditions, and coming of age type of rituals, are designed to impart what is ineffable. But once experienced, the brotherhood now has a common frame of reference where the nuances of each other’s experiences can be understood.
People have a need to be accepted by others, and too often when they speak they parrot back their cultural programming, expecting to hear it from everyone around them. This indicates whether or not you are part of that group.
Some people have a need to be right. They can be all sorts of wrong, but the identity of self with their world view is so strong, their ego can’t handle any other information, facts or ways of looking at things.
This is an addiction.
An excellent article came out a while ago describing addiction as an addiction to a perception of self. Granted chemical addiction is horrible, mind altering, and a detriment to a person’s health. If a person gets free of the effects of the drug, the physical addiction, they still have a psychological addiction. Why is that? The metabolism that a person has had as an addict, they have learned how to function as a functional addict, accessing memories and behavioral faculties. Without the chemical crutch, the metabolism necessary to achieve the state of mind where all of one’s memories and faculties isn’t available. This is an addiction to one’s sense of self. Behavioral addiction of expecting to light up a cigarette or smoke on queue from situations, is a matter of breaking habits. But the metabolism and feelings, where one is at their peak efficiency of being themselves is off. In other words, people’s proficiencies are at a peak with their metabolism establish by drugs of choice.
This feeling and self assessment of how we function is a consciousness of and the feelings of knowing and being comfortable with who you are. This makes them feel comfortable. Not being yourself, you are not comfortable. This theory of addiction to self, with chemical addictions is called state dependent behavior. Our behaviors are based on the metabolic dependent state where we know and control our behaviors. Our behaviors confirm a comfort of what we are use to. This is ego, and the support of that ego is Maya.
So how does “State Dependent Behavior” affect the average person. People have 7 – 12 standard sets of emotions, give or take. Each emotional state is like an operating system where they access memories and their faculties/programming. Each emotion is its own operating system. People may share memories between these operating systems or metabolic states that represent in person a feeling. Memories may have been shared, and faculties and reasoning may be shared between these metabolisms, if a person is coherent. Incoherent people, may have inconsistent emotions, memories and faculties from one emotional state to another. Either way they are addicted to their sense and awareness of the flow of feelings and information, in a comfort of who they are regardless of what they are feeling. Consciousness is less about awareness it is about the feeling of connectedness of the various aspects of self, throughout any of their accepted emotions. People can be addicted to being miserable. They are comfortable with who they are and can function in that state. They are addicted to their state dependent behaviors. This is ego and its support is Maya. Chemical addicts, have a chemical that just skews this emotional baseline. It is still the same.
It is this idea of self, ego, and sense of comfort of knowing who one is by the feelings and reaction to information and the world around them, is an addiction. There are people who more adaptable to being uncomfortable and embracing the feelings of others through empathy, relearning to access memories and faculties from a different metabolism.
Case in point, I am a member of Toastmasters. One of our member’s project she chose was what to do about about bullying. I have been bullied a lot in school, and in many ways since. I being a white male, don’t look like I should be at the receiving end of bullying. If you work in America, you experienced varying degrees of it. I spoke about it, and have very well thought out views on what to do, what steps needed to change the culture, etc. and responding to people whose responses were to much like victim blaming, and rape culture mentality. I was emotional. From every member from a disenfranchised group, they liked what I had to say, and enjoyed the passion or emotions I brought to speaking. The white male conservative, told me flat out I needed to calm down, that I was being too emotional.
Social Privilege expects to be comfortable. In this case it was a white conservative male. A previous democratic presidential candidate Howard Dean in celebrating a victory made a guttural “Arrrr”. Subsequent primaries he was canned, panned and turned out for being outwardly emotional. Many studies in the United States, leaders were people that people could feel emotionally safe. In this past election of 45, it was someone played on reflecting the emotions, of a segment of society, where they could feel themselves reflected in this now president. Two edges of the same sword, taking advantage of people’s own addiction to the comfort of themselves.
I have always been the odd man out. I was too smart as a child, too big, too active, too intellectual. I was a child. I was not listened to. Whether I was being bullied, telling the truth, or just trying to explain the bullying I was receiving. I couldn’t be related to. I made people uncomfortable. It was easier to not believe me. I got older, my opinions and views didn’t matter because I was a white male, not a father, not old enough, not from this clique, this group or banter sports, cars or sexual exploits. I did not fit and no matter what I said, how I said it, I didn’t fit. I made people uncomfortable. Fortunately in IT being odd, and intelligent I had a better purchase on this playing field. However, I was not, testosterone poisoned emotional misfit, where most relearn their social queues in a stunted brain, in a more juvenile construct of society, where I had to learn to suck up to the chief troglodyte of any other group. A repeated rendition of the same level of institutional abuse in a new venue.
What I found out sadly disenfranchised groups of people, if deprived of social conditioning in their teen years, develop it in their disenfranchised niche, and repeat the same high school level of unsophisticated control and manipulation. Along with the learned behaviors of sociopaths and narcissists that they have been victimised from.
Victims who work toward being empowered, get to be victims again or trusted sycophants and enablers. The new abusers learn to be experts at their new social venue. And some of the repeat victims learn to fight back.
Those who fight abuse, end up reflecting some of the characteristics of abusers. There is a fine line where victims either learn to stay victims, become abusers themselves or “counter-dependents” Counter-dependence was described in another psychological journal. People fight not to be victims, and standing up for victims, have traits that look like the unsophisticated abusers of the past. So they are dismissed and victimized yet again at whole new level.
Silence and retreat is left for those who won’t fit in the template of society, abuser or victim. Silence and retreat, is left for those who learn to be uncomfortable and learn to hold on to truth regardless of the situation. They certainly were never accepted to be part of a cultural milieu to reinforce comfortable rationalizations, true or not, of ways of being, thinking and information fit for that groups survival. In other words, truth isn’t necessary. As long as the information used between the group that created the effecting controls of reality to keep them alive, truth is irrelevant. Another scientific study showing people use information fit for survival.
I am a pagan, in the late 70’s and 80’s, being a white male was an anathema for all those who were fighting the male patriarchy. Not that I was, I fit the symbols and handles. 30 years later, I got to a ecumenical convention for pagans, the experiences spiritually and studies I have had, there was a consensus amongst the elders of many traditions, I was elder in my own right. These were special interfaith pagan elders, most of them.
A convention I was at last month, again, reinforced that I need to be silent and retreat. I see warm loving people who are all about love, light and liberty. Their approach is to educate, love and share to bridge the gaps in groups and in humanity. I don’t have that this implicit or explicit viewpoint. It works to degrees where people want to grow and change. If any of what I wrote above has impressed on you, and made painfully aware to me, a vast majority of people are unwilling and incapable of changing. They will fight to retain their comfort, their privileged positions. The level of empathy only extends to those closer to them than anyone outside of their comfort level. Even disenfranchised people, people who are liberal empathic, loving and caring, they can’t see how I can be hard, speak hard and want people to survive the evils that exist and are yet to come.
One third of the United States voted for, and maintain an affiliation with people who hate. They choose philosophies that are devoid of empathy for any living being or people other than themselves and their own. They have betrayed the constitution, their faiths in Christianity, and lock step with the goose stepping fascist of this country and pre World War II Germany. I lived in an exit community in the suburbs. People fighting to get out of the ghettos, and those through their unfitness for society or bad luck were falling back into ghettos. My neighborhood had 2 drug gangs based on age, and prostitute house mismanaged by the neighborhood girls all who were under 18. I survived them and their parents who were sociopaths, addicts and narcissists. I can recognize these type of people in all sectors of society. I work very hard not to be a victim.
The one thing I know for sure, sociopaths and psychopaths, don’t have empathy. They never apologize and they never can change. The only time they apologize is when they see a threat of pain, discomfort or death. Then it is a convenient lie to get to the next game. They can only be managed by a constant threat of pain, or death. This is a cold hard fact that makes everyone uncomfortable. People can’t imagine that is true, and the abusers will go out of their way to get enablers to act against anyone who tells the truth and can see them for what they are.
Now people may be victimized by these individuals on rare occasions. Rape culture, sealioning, gas lighting, perpetuates a victimology. For others, it is so outside of their comfort level to recognize this evil in other people. It is easier to believe the liar and abuser than the victim.
I went to a pagan gathering. I tried to explain that the growing threat in our country of embolden sociopaths, that we need to be prepared. Love and light, and you are out and don’t fit. My language is too hard. And, “who hurt you”. Now at first, I thought that this is a legitimate thing to think of that a person has been so unlucky to be in the minds of being so hard and adamant. Okay, this is true. But I don’t deny, education, love, empathy and any means and methods to make bridges and establish communication between people. The Pagan communities are just starting to do this more than ever. The past 30 – 40 years, ego, and control of ones own empowerment, dealing all of the low level abusers, and cleaning them out of the community, there is this light, love and sense of maturity. Good, they have earned it.
Silence and retreat. “Who Hurt You”, not only made plain I was on the outside again, it presented me as a damaged person to the group and made what ever truth or value I had to offer null and void. Next verse same as the first. Silence and retreat.
My teacher called me a “white hat”. Everyone else was shopkeepers. We aren’t in the old west, and it isn’t evident to these good folk of the town, what it takes to protect them from the “black hats”. They may invite a white hat to dinner, but they will never be part of their social group or invited to play pinochle. A White Hat has to love these shopkeepers and what they stand for. But what shopkeepers see is someone harder, faster and meaner than the black hats, no matter how kind and caring they are in town.
The West African stories of the Oriesha and Loa from Ile’ Ifa or Voodou, don’t speak to this. All of the Oriesha and Loa fit the village except one or three. Ile’ Ifa or Voodou is a religion and its magic is supernatural dealing with these venerate ancestors and the supreme being Oludumare. The one who doesn’t fit is Ochossi. Ochossi is called the king of the witches. Witches are hated, they don’t venerate or work with the Loa or Oriesha. Their magic deals with power, the dead and power of the land. Usually they act selfishly because they are on the fringe of society. The African beliefs encouraged community, working with each other, in their beliefs, divination systems and stories. It took Abrahamic religions to destroy that.
All of the Oriesha and Loa have “roads” lessons to be learned or paths, that reflect in their adherents lives who have the influence or head of the Loa or Oriesha. The one Exception is Ochossi. His roads are hidden. He is respected by the old King Obatala or Damballah. But he is still not part of the village unless called upon to serve justice. He is part of the woods, and his other function is to find new places for new villages.
There comes a time when the old villages die or get murdered or the people destroy themselves. Ochossi helps them build that new village. Obatala is the new king for a short time and put to pasture.
He has experiences and insights that the village people will not and can not hear. They have no common frame of reference. The religion, and the Oriesha and Loa fit in the standard sets of emotions and experience expected out of a community and a culture. They make things comfortable. Ochossi isn’t allowed to feel comfortable. Thanks for having me as fifth wheel, I’ll go back to the woods, again. Silence and retreat.
There is one story that is hidden, that I learned. It is a side story for when the world was new, and the souls of the dead were wandering around, It was getting to be noisy and unhealthy for the living and the Oriesha and Loa. Yemaya the mother of the Loa and Oriesha was tasked of managing the souls. They are said to become fish. In other stories the fish went to the horizon and became stars, and returned to the earth to be reincarnated. The Sub-Saharan pre-Sumerian script that has elements going all the way across Asia the symbol for fish and star were very similar. It shows up in Egyptian cosmology and motifs. For this to happen, the Oriesha and Loa had to accept the touch of Iku or Death. Here is the hidden story, Ochossi chose to touch death or Iku himself. Ode was a hunter who had no name who loved Yemaya in some stories that bore the Oriesha. Ochossi was an ode, a hunter. His son, Er-Inle was a hunter and fisherman. Oshun didn’t keep her son, when Chango was around. Ode knew old magic, and old truth. He was one with the forest and the trees. Where did Iroko come from? Who did he learn what he taught Orunmila/Orunla? Ochossi had his magics. Er-Inle learned the ancient magics of Yemaya, and his tongue was cut out. He went to live in the swamp, a place for outcasts, with another Snake Oriesha/Loa Abata.
They can not teach people the truth, the magics, or their insights. They have carried it from lifetime to lifetime. Iku was an old old friend. Embracing Iku, they would find themselves as themselves in the next lifetime, under new circumstances. It is the hunter that helps build the new village, establishes its justice, and protects it from the bad influences. He is a leader for a very short while. He returns to the home that loves him and embraces him, the universe. He can travel back and forth from Obatala and Oludumare. Elegua knows of his travels, but hasn’t lived his experiences.
I can not speak the truth that people are not ready to learn to live with. We have to be there to build what is no more. Repair what no one thinks to fix. To work old and ancient magics that none are prepared to deal with. Self Sacrifice and embrace Iku, to make it work. The story of Aslan in Narnia, he knew of the deeper magic, that the ice queen didn’t. Self sacrifice brought him back to life.
This is why the roads are hidden. Not because they can’t be learned or experienced. It is because most people even spiritual ones are not prepared to do the sacrifices of the self to learn this path of ordeals and trials.
I freely chose this. Silence and retreat, is not my nature, but it is required, when you are not accepted in the village, even though you love the people and are willing to fight the evils that they can’t conceive of.
John here is this little book, eat it up, tarry till I come. Occasionally a rogue star will pulls stars to a new constellation. Heaven and Earth shall roll away, and a new Heaven and Earth shall unfold. Many mysteries. Each ineffable. Spoken and unheard are true nevertheless.
There will come a time where people will have to trust people who traversed hells and survived it versus the people who drag people into a hell and leave them there.
Side note: The apocalypse, when will it come? It will come as a thief in the night.
This biblical sidebar exemplifies the blindness and absolute complicitness of this age, the people of the United States, it’s Christians who pray and actively work toward the nihilism of the end of times. They have brought it upon themselves and are the very evil agents that have engendered it through their nascience.
Ancient numerology, Greek and Hebrew, do not reveal it. It is only revealed in modern numerology, that same number of the Sun 666. The beast is known as 666, is a thief in the night, a FOX. F = 6, O = 6 + 9 (remove the nines), and X = 6 + 9 + 9 (remove the nines) is 666. The whore of Babylon is known by the same number her name is Alec. ALEC; (A = 1) + (E = 5) = 6; (L = 3) + (C = 3) = 6. Modern numerology of a name takes the vowels and consonants separately. Together it adds up to a 3. Where is the last 6? ALEC is short for American Legislative Exchange Council which reduces to a 33 or a 6. Blind and complicit in its creation.
The Sun whose number is 666 was a metaphor for the Golden Emperor Constantine. The off gold 45 and love of gold, is but a servant.
Not speaking for the OTO and being a Thelemite, Babalon vs Babylon, and Baphomet are not of this biblical currents and metaphors. Like the yin yang symbol there is always a seed of the opposite embedded in a time and a place. Will it flower fully, only to those who keep the secret. What secret, ones that are published openly. Again the truth is there. Psalms 82 …. know ye not ye are gods…. and in the NT, you can become brothers and sisters of Christ. Not his children, but full siblings. There is no part of me that is not of the Gods.
I love this country, I served as a Marine, I do not love the government. The constitution was flawed and had the opportunity to be amended to fulfill its charter for Life, Liberty and the pursuit of happiness. Rome died. Various iterations of France’s revolutions died. Monarchies come and go. Greece who created the first Democratic experiment, died. Evolution comes with growing pains. And the old must give way to the new. The Brave and the Free will hold on to what this country was meant to be, while the rest, abandon Life, Love and Liberty, who are traitors and will succumb to their nihilism. May the Brave and the Free who hold sacred, Life, Love and Liberty survive to restore a people to a land to do what is right and good.
As a spiritual person, I don’t believe, I pursue to know. I do have one irrational belief. I believe in the inherent goodness of mankind. Sometimes I am justified in this belief, other times I am severely disappointed. This belief is not what one expects to exist, it is a belief as a prayer and internal work of Love to desire it to exist. In this hard exterior, is Love. That appears to be hidden and unseen except by those who share in the path and the work. The proof shall be in the work and its success.
Life, Love and Truth in harmony begets integrity. That is one half of the seed.
Coming to the Dark of the year, This Article is exceptionally important. The belief in light love and goodness and the law of attraction to minimize the actual horrors that women, people of color or any one else experiences to do victim blaming is hideous.
People are not easily categorized or pigeon holed, to make your dealing of ones life by simple handles. Life is messy, expressing real love and concern is messier still.
Roll up your sleeves and wallow in life with me. Life, love and liberty are ours only if we make sure everyone has it.
Photo credit: StockSnap. Description: Woman with eyes closed and shadow across face.
I want to talk about something I witnessed last week in the online world.
First, a little background. A couple of years ago, I became increasingly aware of a pervasive phenomenon in the (overwhelmingly white) women’s spirituality/ personal growth circles I move in. I noticed persistent attempts to deny and disown painful realities by insistence (overt or implied) that we create our struggles with our negative thinking or energy or low vibration or fill-in-the-blank. I do believe the way we frame things in our thinking can be important to our well being and success, up to a point. I do believe we have some authentic choice around where we place our focus, and those choices can impact our well being and success, up to a point. However, I found the blanket application and oversimplification of these ideas to…
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A good man.
When society has lost family or the family is dysfunctional and there is no wisdom nor models to be successful, at what the past generations done, and can see the changes in the future. When there is no community, but neighbors and family scrambling after every last dime, then spend it to entertain themselves, because there is no future, no other sense but the gratifying of the self, there is no man or woman or child that knows good. When people who steal, cajole, trick and lie into being comfortable and buy the hangers on that keep him company, believing money can buy loyalty, and then enjoy when they fall due to hubris and mistakes. There is no hero to be supported, to learn from, to survive in spite of it all.
Integrity is when a man knows himself and the world as it is and should be and lives it. Then that is not just another male of the species, that is a Man. If a woman does the same and has integrity she is a woman. We are a social species. The success of our children, our future, and others depends on each other. When we can not identify with baker, the mother, the mechanic, the grocer, the doctor or the warrior, we don’t value them, nor ourselves. And honest good man and woman, recognize that they are not islands, they are part of a community. And it is that community that existed once, exists or even harder must exist in the future, is what one lives and dies for, for in it, do we not add to our soul, and to the collective memory and a spirit of the people.
And only in a community that supports each other can any of us survive. A good man or woman who is undervalued and underappreciated, there is no support or good found towards anyone in the community. The following of celebrities is a thing it is empty and hollow as hollow as they are. Otherwise they tear each other down. The mob ruled by parasites neither are people, they have with the lack of integrity stealing the spirit of others have carved their souls to nothing and are but the living dead. Integrity builds the soul, with or without a community, it comes from an honest relationship if not in community and kindred, but at least with the universe, that knows the truth of these individuals.
An honorable man keeps their honor shiny, it is the onus of obligation to oneself, their past and the future, it is the same root word to shine or to meet and obligation in Japan known as “on”, and it means to shine one’s sword. Honor, onus, on, my sword, my soul, integrity to shine for the past, the present and the future. This whether appreciated or not, to at least if nothing else, a caretaker of my soul, working for my childrens future, a community that I can reincarnate in, so may it be.
Lo, in the darkness, with no love, light, support, nor a single shred where the world would acknowledge my existence.
Shrouded by that which could not love, nor pity, nor do what is right.
There when in the pain of the desire of oblivion, not just death, I embraced, there was darkness. And then my soul, from right, frith, and will, with its integrity, the universe showed me who or what I am. The universe and nor that which enshadowed me, could grant me my wish. I exist, and the universe nor the gods can touch me. And in that, I saw my immortality.
In that anyone with integrity adds to this flame of adamantium. Where those live the lie, faithless, feckless and desiring of no communion with others except their own pleasure extinguish their precious self, one sliver of a time. I weep not for them, nor do I take joy in watching the walking dead.
I weep for those whose life was extinguished before they could fulfill their potential.
Find your light guard it and enshrine it with your integrity, it will shine in the light, even if its obscured ephemeral willowisps of time.
Shine throughout time.